I love daisies.  They’re beautiful flowers that for me exude a sense of innocence, naiveté, fun, and beauty in its simplest form.

Some people may not like daisies because they don’t have a scent.  They prefer roses.  Roses come in more colors and varieties.  Plus, some of them smell heavenly!

Some people don’t like roses though because they don’t like the thorns.

So, maybe some peoples’ favorite flowers are lilacs.  The scent is intoxicating.  I know people who don’t like them, too.  The reason?  The scent is too strong.  And so it goes…we all have flower preferences–likes and dislikes.  They’re all beautiful each in their own way.  They’re a wonderful addition to our every day world.

What is your favorite flower?  Why?

Labeling and judging things in our world helps us make sense of it.  If you think about it:  Flowers are just flowers–we give them meaning.  Heck, we’ve even given them names.  People are like flowers.  We learn as we go through childhood to judge people and not like certain parts of them–or all of them.  But just like the flower, their essence is beauty.  Our essence is also love.

Whatever you don’t like about a certain flower reflects a preference or an experience you’ve had.  Having these certain preferences doesn’t make you “right” or “wrong” or make the flower “bad” or “good.”  The flower just is.  It’s the meanings you put on the flower that defines it for you.  Someone else could love the flower–no complaints.  Same thing goes for people.

People may behave a certain way that makes it easier to judge them.  They make look a certain way or believe certain things that goes against your preferences.

[Tweet “Just because people act, believe, look different, etc. doesn’t make them any less of a person.”]

It’s taken me a good part of my life to come to understand this.  I came up with this post after my husband compared me to a daisy. It’s one of my favorite flowers–they represent innocence, naiveté, happiness, and beauty simplified.  Some people love the daisy, some think it’s okay, some don’t like it.  It’s just being its little daisy self. I am Nicole.  Others put on me their judgments of who they think I am.  So, to extrapolate this into one of my big life lessons:  I have certain people in my life who have harshly (and that’s my judgment) criticized me for several different reasons.  I am the same person.  Actually I’ve grown over the years, but they judge me as being “less than” in some way–according to their own perceptions.  This has cost us a loving connection (actually, I remain open to talking with them about my perceived imperfections.  They’ve shut down communication).  They can’t relate to the beauty in me because they are too busy pointing out the perceived faults in me.  To others, I am more than enough–they don’t see the faults the others see in me.  They see my gifts.  I am the same person–different perceptions.  Like the flower, I am just me–Nicole.  Judge me according to your views and perspectives and you’ll see all kinds of things–but these things are from your perspectives and your own experiences.  They tell me much more about what’s going on with you than they do about me.  I don’t have to take it on–because their perceptions don’t define me.  I do–and I know I am enough.  I’m not better than or less than.  I am…well, I’m me.  And you’re you.  You aren’t better than or less than me.  You’re uniquely you.  And that’s wonderful!

Judgments are a funny thing.  We, as humans, have learned to label our world so it makes more sense to us.

[Tweet “Judgements not only simplify things, but they complicate them as well.”]

The world needs more positivity.  When you feel tempted to judge someone, think twice about it.  We’re only here for a short time on this earth–life is too short to spend in judgment, putting others down.  This harms relationships.  Often this is done unconsciously as a way to help you feel better about yourself, but if you pay attention to your body and mind’s cues, you’ll notice you actually feel worse afterwards.

Spend time with others who lift you up and support you.  

You are a reflection of your peer group.  If you surround yourself with others who are positive and uplifting–guess which direction you’ll head!  If you spend time with others who put you down–or others–think twice about how you want to be in the world.  It’s your choice, but hey–life’s too short to spend in negativity!  And, that’s my judgment so…oh boy, here we go again!  Have a great week everyone!  You’re awesome–don’t forget that!