Harmony. 1. agreement; accord; harmonious relations. 2. a consistent, orderly, or pleasing arrangement of parts; congruity (from dictionary.com). Harmony is also used to refer to music; t’s the blending of chords that produces sound that is pleasing to listen to.
Harmony at home. Where individuals in a home create a place that is pleasant to be in. Where the energy of your relationships are appreciative, loving, peaceful, and positive. Where individuals are an interdependent team; flourishing on their own, and flourishing together. Like a symphony, individuals, couples, and families can create a beautiful energetic experience for one another in the personal space of home.
Harmony at home. Like a house, it needs a foundation. This foundation is made up of appreciation, gratitude, love, and positivity. You also need healthy communication, honesty, emotional connection, interdependence, peacefulness, sharing, and fun. For adults, it also includes the ability to claim 100% responsibility for your experience, healing your wounds, continued growth, shared values, sharing of your lives, and consciousness and awareness.
Harmony at home. Like a symphony, the individual notes and chords produce a beautiful sound and melody. If one part is off, there is discordance. In a family, that part can be the amount of negative interactions outweighing the positive, a person’s attitude, dysfunctional ways of communicating, a lack of meaningful rituals…Many things–emotions, body language, communication patterns, negativity–can ruin the harmony in your home. Something else to think about too: The disharmony you see on the outside, may be a reflection of the way you’re feeling inside.
If you want harmony at home, the first place to begin is within yourself.
Here are some ways to create a more peaceful home that embodies your concept of harmony:
- Pay attention to the emotions you feel on a consistent basis. Write down a list of the positive and negative emotions you experience in a week. Consciously choose to spend more time feeling those positive emotions than the emotions that detract from a higher quality of life.
- Pay attention to your rituals. Is it your habit to come home from work and not greet your partner and/or your kids lovingly? Do you sit and watch tv or pop on your computer, phone, or iPad more than you engage in conversation or activities with your loved ones?
- Pay attention to what you focus on. Are you more focused on the unfairness in your life? The things that are going wrong instead of right? Make a choice to focus on more empowering things. Instead of complaining, resolve to resolve things! Find solutions, not more problems.
- Since you can’t control others, reflect on your own contributions to the disharmony in your household. Do you need more self-care rituals so you feel taken care of and not so depleted? Do you know what your needs are so you can communicate these to your partner? Do you ask for your needs if you don’t receive them? By the way, no one gets all their needs met all the time–as my husband likes to say, “that’s called indulgence.”
- Get clear on what a harmonic home looks and feels like to you. Part of it has to do with your physical surroundings. When things are too messy or disorganized, it can feel, although you may not even realize it consciously, disharmonious. What else do you feel is standing in your way to a more harmonious home? How can you do something differently–starting today–that will change these things?