You are not meant to sit on the sidelines of life, watching the action. You are meant to be playing in the game–playing in the Game of Life. There is nothing wrong with being cheerleaders or supporters of the players on the field, but you owe it to yourself to engage in life, too. Somewhere, between the sidelines and the playing field is a healthy balance for you. Have you found it yet?
When I write about the Game of Life, I am not writing about the manipulations people can make to win. I am writing about the fun, the sense of adventure, the feeling of connection, the learning opportunities, the ability to get out there and make “mistakes” and move forward.
Life isn’t meant to be so serious–to be stuck in disempowering emotions or to be plodding through our days, waiting for Saturday or “Someday” to come.
If you aren’t engaged in life, it’s your fear that is holding you back. Fear of success maybe–or maybe it’s of failure. Fear of not being perfect. Fear of rejection. There are so many fears, but one deep core issue most people share is the feeling of not being good enough. This belief drives a lot of fears in people.
“I’m not good enough.”
Where does this belief come from? Every person is different and has different experiences, but this message began to be instilled in you as a little child. Think back to when you were little. You were so in the moment–laughing, playing, singing–you were free! Then your well-meaning parents or other adults began putting limits on you. Some limits were for your safety; others were at the whim of the adult putting them on you. “Stop singing so loud! I have a headache!” Or, you receive a “C” on an essay you thought you did well on. You don’t realize that another teacher would have given you an “A” on it–that these are just subjective opinions and not fact. In those moments you aren’t accepted by adults–these moments manifest into “You’re not enough”. It slowly diminishes your spirit, and your sense of fun and playfulness. This Game of Life becomes a serious game–not a fun and adventurous one. You grow up wanting to unconsciously prove this belief that you’re not enough–either by over-compensating or by creating a self-fulfilling prophecy.
“This is fun,” you said as a young child. But eventually, taking part in the Game of Life became “I’m scared. I don’t think I want to play anymore. I think I’ll sit over here and just watch others living an abundant life.” Illness, the loss of a job, divorce–these major life events can have you sitting on the sidelines partly in a spirit of giving up. But life’s too short to be watching others have all the fun. You deserve that too! The Game of Life is about taking these challenges that everyone has to face and creating learning opportunities out of them. “Oh wow. Going through a divorce really sucks, but what life lesson is here for me to learn? What fears do I need to face?”
There are a lot of rules for being a part of the Game of Life–but Source/God/Spirit doesn’t punish you for not playing it right–you do! You are penalizing yourself for not being engaged. When you’re playing in the Game, it’s more about cooperation than competition (comparison can suck the life right out of you). Competition is for motivating and inspiring yourself to do your best–not to beat someone else, but to push your own limits.
One rule is to…wait for it…have fun! Laugh, sing, dance, smile! Move your body and have fun being healthy and happy.
Another rule is to honor people where they are in life. If they knew better, they’d do better. Don’t put on them what they “should” be doing. Play your own game and don’t try to be playing theirs. If anything, support and encourage others.
Here’s another rule: Be in the moment. Take your mind off the past and turn it from the future and practice being in the Now.
And another rule: Practice gratitude and express your appreciation for all the wonderfulness in your life.
One surefire way to be in the Game is to pursue your passions and to live your purpose in life. If you don’t know these, take steps to find them out. That’s where working with a life coach can help you.