Do you have relationship problems? Is your relationship hurting? Are you feeling emotional pain? Do you feel disconnected from your partner or feeling like something is missing? Has the spark gone? Do you wonder if you’re going to be alone forever or if your relationship can be saved?
Take a moment, take a breath, and relax. You’ve come to the right place for help.
The first step- admitting there’s a problem with your relationship- can be the hardest.
Somehow, admitting there’s a problem opens you to the possibility that the relationship will not work out- and that can be scary! That’s where relationship coaching and couples counseling is far better than the alternative.
GET THE HELP YOU NEED TO HAVE THE RELATIONSHIP OF YOUR DREAMS
What’s the alternative that most people choose? It’s denying the very issues that will eventually erode a loving relationship. Owning those issues and learning from them is how you change the game. You can take charge of your relationship and you begin to move towards love! Don’t be one of the many people who are too scared to take the steps necessary to change their relationship. Because in every other part of our lives, people are willing to make the changes necessary for success.
Think about this for a moment: If your team lost 60% of its games, would you do something differently?
What if your business was failing 60% of the time- would you make changes? If you were losing 60% of your money on investments–you’d change. What if your child continually failed in school? Change wouldn’t be optional–change would be mandatory! You wouldn’t continue to keep doing the same old thing, expecting a different outcome from the same old behaviors that put you into this spot in the first place! Relationships fail 60% of the time and this statistic tells you something isn’t working. It’s time for change~and someone’s gotta change–you, your partner, or both.
Look, there’s no owner’s manual that teaches you how to have a loving and intimate connection with your partner. You’ll find lots of books, workshops, counseling theories, and advice out there, but if they worked there would be a whole lot more happy and emotionally healthy couples out in the world~ and believe me, I know the problems that people face. I have spent years in the pursuit of a relationship that embodies a conscious and caring connection.
Do you want your relationship to become a haven or continue living in relationship hell? You can have a place where you and your partner respect, love and learn together–away from the issues of the outside world. You can go there to experience the security and safety of what your “home base” offers you. But what happens when you or your partner are carrying emotional baggage from childhood or past relationships, unresolved resentments, or dysfunctional behaviors? What if your relationship is full of arguing? Or emotional distancing?
HERE ARE SOME QUESTIONS TO CONSIDER FOR YOU OR FOR YOUR PARTNER
You want to be in a relationship that is loving and supporting but maybe…
- You or your partner are uncomfortable with intimacy
- You or your partner sabotage the relationship when it feels too good
- The word “divorce” or “breaking up” crossed your or your partner’s mind or lips more than once in the last month or year
- You are afraid to speak your truth
- You have suppressed your truth for so long that you suffer from suppression, repression, depression, or denial
- You have low self-esteem or insecurity
- You ignore your intuition or body messages
- You fear punishment or abandonment
- You do not know yourself well enough
- You do not know when your old emotional wounding has been triggered and you’re acting unconsciously
- You aren’t committed to the relationship
- You communicate using blame or shame
- You unconsciously live in drama
- You can’t discuss your issues without personalizing them
NOW ASK YOURSELF WHAT HAS TO CHANGE FOR YOU TO…
- Be in a relationship that revolves around good will, caring, nurturing, and love?
- A relationship where you are able to consider and respectfully communicate your needs to your partner?
- Have the fearlessness to heal your past wounds?
- Deal with your own feelings?
- Develop new behaviors that won’t be getting in the way of a healthy and loving relationship?
- Create a relationship that honors and empowers you as well as your partner?
If these represent your values, you’ve come to the right place.
Relationship coaching will help you get to the relationship that you dream of. There’s plenty of room in the world for more love and loving couples in it. Your children (if you have children) need healthy role models for relationships (because you’re their first role model for love!). Your children need this modeling so they can grow up to have happy, loving, and healthy relationships themselves. You deserve to have a loving relationship.
We work with individuals and couples who are interested in a higher quality relationship. You can request to work with me, Don (my husband) or with us together. You will get the benefit of 40+ years combined experience, 2 Psy. M degrees, a marriage and family therapy degree, authors who specialize in relationships, and caring compassionate direction to move you towards the love you desire in your life.
We help people who typically fall into one of these three categories:
1. You are thinking of taking the next step to long-term commitment–you are thinking of moving in together or getting married. You love this person but you want to make sure you “get off on the right foot.” To make this work and take your relationship to the next level, you want to be sure you have the right foundation in place.
2. You are married or in a long-term relationship. Maybe it’s boring. You want the spark and passion back. Or, you’re arguing or ignoring each other and you’d like to argue less and stop hurting each other as much.
3. You are in a committed relationship but you are “on the fence” about whether you should stay or go. You and/or your partner have thought of leaving the relationship. You might even be thinking it is too late to save it. While all marriages may not be made to last, you’d like to make sure that you can say you tried to rescue your relationship. If you determine that it can’t be saved, you’d like to part on good terms with the clarity, tools, and peace of mind that you tried your best to succeed with this relationship.
Here are a couple questions for you:
- If you have children, would you want them to have the same relationship with their partners as you do now with yours?
- Do you remember what it was like when you first met? How good you felt? How loved and cherished you felt? Or how the interactions between you two were so incredibly loving and positive?
If you’re ready to make the change, use the contact form below or call 631-339-0588 to learn new communication techniques, ways to connect, and other proven ways to enhance your relationship.
Coaching is different than therapy.
In our coaching sessions, we’re looking to find out what is in the way of you loving and growing together. Often these problems revolve around the creation of the “system” (the term system refers to your relationship) right now and what we can change today to make your relationship thrive. You will develop the ability to confront fears, communicate your truth, eliminate blame and shame from your interactions, take 100% responsibility for your life and so much more.
Our approach to coaching is a holistic and responsible life. This includes the development of new styles of internal reflecting and outward communication. This philosophy is based on the belief that the client possesses the power to change, and coach’s role is to help the client become aware of how to understand and utilize that power.
Here, solution-based techniques help to discover what thoughts and beliefs keep you stuck in a pattern of behavior that just doesn’t work. This is a philosophy of empowerment–it accepts the client as the driving force in change. This approach brings about effective long-term results, for the reason that the client discovers how to utilize his/her own inner strengths and gifts rather than having to rely on someone else for solutions to life’s difficult issues.
I am the co-author, with my husband Don Nenninger of The Secrets of Loving Relationships. We not only know what it takes to be in a loving relationship, we live it! Our relationship is one most people could only dream of.
And while it’s great to be married to your soul mate, it is another thing to continue to maintain the quality of a soul mate relationship.
You can’t do this if you are “unconscious.” Conscious relationships consist of what we call the Twelve Pillars. These pillars make up the foundation of a conscious relationship. They include the pillars of gratitude and appreciation, shared values, and fun–among other things–things you’ll learn when you’re working with us.
If you are ready to experience more from your relationship, if you want to learn how to get back on track, or you’re wondering if your relationship has “hit the end of the road”–Call for help.
How much is a great relationship worth to you?
Use the form below to schedule an appointment. Let us know in the comment section who you would like to work with: me (Nicole), my husband (Don), or both of us.
Call (631) 339-0588 for in-person sessions for clients who live near Long Island, NY. Each session is approximately 50 minutes long.
Do you live out of the area? Get a Skype session