“Happy holidays!” someone shouted to me. “Mmm hmmm, ” I mumbled. Gosh, I felt miserable then. About ten years ago I faced my first Christmas as an almost-single woman. We decided we would split up in early December but he’d move out of the house after our youngest daughter’s birthday in January. So, we kept …
Divorce can be tough. My own divorce process took almost three years and it was extremely hard trying to keep the kids out of the fray. It’s hard for most people to handle the break-up of relationships (I say “most,” but Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin seem to be doing okay with their divorce). The …
One of the hardest things about divorce if you’re a parent is having to now split custody of your kids with your ex. I used to be a stay-at-home mother–a conscious decision that was made by both of us for the well-being of our children. Then, with the break-up of our marriage, I found myself forced to …
One Little Thing They Didn’t Tell You About Co-Parenting Read More »
Reading through dozens of articles on eating disorders and parenting practices (this is for a class in the Marriage and Family Therapy graduate program I’m enrolled in) recently has started me thinking: You can proactively take charge of your parenting by implementing some changes starting today. It doesn’t mean you won’t have issues come up, …
When I first separated from my ex, it was hard to refrain from stating what I was going through to a selective audience who would listen. Most of my inner circle knew what was going on and they knew about my painful break-up after 17 years of being married. It’s hard to shift into making …
Why Complaining About Your Ex Can Actually be Bad for You Read More »
In the news recently you probably couldn’t help but hear of the story of the three kids sent to juvenile detention center for refusing to see their father. A little background here: A Michigan judge ordered the children, ages 9 to 15, to be sent to a juvenile detention center after failing to follow her …
I have had several challenges during my child- and adulthood that have helped define the person I am today. And what has gotten me through them is knowing this: This too will pass. When I was seven years old, I lost my adoptive mother. Pregnant at the time, she passed away suddenly from a pulmonary …
Have you ever watched a movie and its message stayed with you long afterwards? Recently, I watched the movie “Undefeated,” a documentary based on the true story of a high school football team, the Manassas Tigers, who when the movie begins, have yet to have a winning season. The high school serves a very poor …
Many of you know by now my experience of being a rejected parent (I have written before on my experience of Parental Alienation) of two of our kids: one biological, one a stepchild. These instances began during their middle school years (an age ripe for this) and shortly after my remarriage. Since then, I’ve received …
Watching the “Guardians of the Galaxy” movie with my stepson and husband recently (hey–good movie, by the way!), I found myself thinking about the classic Good Guy/Bad Guy scenario where you know who the villain is and who the heroes are. It can be pretty black and white in the movies. In real life, it’s not …
This Type of Thinking Is Terrible for Relationships Read More »
As we finish up the final week in August (2014), I can’t help but be amazed at how fast the summer months have flown by. In a week and a half, three of my kids will start school; and one starts her junior year at Notre Dame this week (their first football game is this Saturday!). I …
Having given birth to three beautiful, healthy baby girls and as the mother of a wonderful stepson, I can truly appreciate the concept of celebrating birthdays. The actual birth day is a wonderful celebration of life, miracles, and love. Each year through the concept of birthdays, we celebrate the gift of a person’s birth and …
“When you meet anyone, treat the event as a holy encounter. It’s through others that we either find or love our self. For you see, nothing is accomplished without others. When you eliminate the concept of separation from your thoughts and your behavior, you begin to feel your connection to everything and everyone.” – Dr. Wayne …
Moving Past the Pain of Being Rejected by Your Family Read More »
I love this quote from Brene Brown that I found in an interview with her for the Washington Post: “Are you the adult that you want your child to grow up to be?” Isn’t that a great question? It makes you think about how you want to be in the world as a role …
Brene Brown’s “Are You the Adult that You Want Your Child to Grow Up to Be?” Read More »
This past week a reader (who will remain anonymous) posed a really interesting question: Is it okay if a parent tells their child that the reason for the family splitting up is because the other parent had an affair? And going further I would add, is there a certain age in which it’s appropriate to …
To Tell or Not to Tell–Should Kids Know About Their Parent’s Affair? Read More »
I think divorce has been one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to go through. I’ve dealt with the death of my mother at age 7 (she was pregnant and died suddenly from a pulmonary embolism), neglect and abuse in my childhood after that, the death of my younger twin brother (I am an …
“Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.” ~Jessica Howell I absolutely love this quote! I’ve relied on it in the past to get me through some really tough times. When I am going through a particularly challenging time, I remind myself to let go and let life handle the details. When …
Time and time again, people will create these awesomely amazing resolutions like this year I will get rich, I will be organized, or I will lose weight–only to lose sight of their goal after a month of not quite being on track with it. It can be overwhelming to state goals in such broad, sweeping …
This week’s quote came from Facebook: “Your beliefs don’t make you a better person, your behavior does.” It reminds me of the Golden Rule, which is based on your behaviors: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Or, do no harm. It is a lovely sentiment, but often times people are …
I love learning about relationships and psychology. In part it is because I have spent my life working on my own personal psychology and relationships. I know firsthand that if you don’t address your own childhood crap, you’re going to eke out your issues all over the place. I didn’t want that for my life. …
This is Why it’s Bad to Ignore Your Childhood Crap Read More »
“Think thoughts that make you feel good, make choices that make you feel good, and take actions that make you feel good.” ~Cheryl Richardson, You Can Create an Exceptional Life As I enter the second week after this entire website crashed, I am filled with a sense of acceptance (actually since it happened, I have …
